I’m angry at the snow preventing me from running my best pace outside on the non-icy sidewalks.
I’m angry at my legs for being too short to fit the regular lengthed lulu winter running pants.
I’m angry because I just stubbed my toe while trying to find my running shoes.
I’m angry because I missed my running group tonight because I had to stay late at work.
Today is one of those days that you just want to crawl into a ball and hide from the world. I want to eat a giant chocolate cake, topped with whipped cream, and then finish off a bag of jalapeno cheddar Doritos for my dessert. There are no rules when you’re angry, apparently – dessert can be chips, and dinner can be cake.
Regardless, today I am a little ball of anger, and that’s not usually the case. If I ever drank coffee and experienced that caffeine high people claim to need to get their day going, I’d probably bounce off the walls and have no friends left because the pain-in-the-butt sunny disposition that I already possess, would result in people wanting to punch me out. However, today I’m just angry.
I don’t usually talk about negative things, but I think it’s important to acknowledge when you’ve just had a terrible day, and it’s okay to feel sorry for yourself for a little bit – provided of course that you’re not using your anger to punch someone out etc. Anger is healthy. My life is not perfect. It is okay to be angry at so many different reasons that it don’t make sense.
Today is that day.
No one did anything particularly mean or bad to me today. I just have an issue with letting two hundred things go, without getting angry about them at the time, or speaking up about my feelings. Where a normal person would say something while these two hundred things were happening at the very time they were happening, I just let things go, and process internally. It’s something I’ve been working on for a while and every now and again, I still have an angry day. I’m having less of them and I’m getting better at telling people how I really feel about things that happen to me, but I’m not perfect by any means.
“You cannot change the things that happens to you, but you can change how you react to them.” I read that quote somewhere once, and I try to remember it when something bad does happen, or when someone is a big enough jerk to me that they warrant a flying drop-kick. (Note: I don’t want you to try to picture me doing one of these, because it will take away from the non-hilarity of this blog post ;))
That being said, I’m not going to eat the cake or Doritos (Sorry, guyssssss!) I’m going to lace up my shoes and run a long run solo, on the wintery streets of Toronto, in my too long for me winter lulu pants, with my tunes cranked up, and a slight grin on my face, because the anger will dissipate as I run my very first steps out the door. Running is my therapy. Anger get out of here 😉